There is 1 note that i read from my friend's blog. I just like it, and let me try to translate it here, This is about a monolog with itself....
P.S :
"I ever feel become some1 that get the most betraying in this world, or the most guilty person or the one who had alot of problem, or the most unlucky person. i've walked alone on the edge of road in one town, in once evening, while the buses and the cars just run like as people with no care. I ever felt i dont have friends just for listening what i felt" you said with so sad voice..
There is a untold sadness, like as the electrical cables that hang on all over the city's skylight. How to break an complexity things to be simple and real? while malls and shopping centres, restaurant, always seem friendly to invite us to get there, It Never really honest to accept us what we are....
"All of us have things that we could handle better than others who do it. Unfortunately, sometime we lost our best capability - in the precise time - when we really need it. Sometimes we have limitted space to allow others at there, sometimes we only want to be alone. Till We walk in long way to the train station or standing on escallator of a mall, seeing and watching a sad face, a worriying that look same on everyone's face, It turns out All of us having problems" You said..hesitating..
I see, I ever stand on the same shoes u used. But where we must go? which one life we should go? is it true we should go? People that we thought happy, turn out keep sadness and sorrows deeper than we could ever imagine...
"Sometimes, I miss home. There is no home without problems, But when i am at home, every problems always easier. If you ask why? i couldnt explain..." You said..still in doubt.
"Then, i remember home. Oh, i miss every comfort and discomfort of my home. I miss the smell of my mom's cooking, I miss my mom's cough when she cook food for us, I miss the smell of my old pillows, every wind in my home. Mom and Dad ever get fighting, but they always try to be good parents. Voice of my sister that shout at her children, or freak funny voice that sounding by my nephews when they are singing. Oh, Maybe i should go home in the real meaning of it.
"Why i cry? Why u cry? Most of us believe that we could make a diference, can change something until one time we are truly wake up, and realize that we are fail"... You said..sadly..
Ahhhh, why do we always make ourselves feel guilty? Why do we tend to be morose? why we never say thank u for ourselves? for good things and bad things too that we've done so far? Thank you for always survive, and always decide to get up and start move on again...
"Thank you" You said suddenly, for your ownself "For things that speakable and unspeakable"
Then I send a sms to my own number phone "Thank You, Only You that can accept me what ever i am, and only by making you happy, then I ll be happy too"
Everyone is busy to make other people arround them happy but most of us forget to love our ownselves. No life without problems but thats not mean we couldnt survive. I have too many friends arround me and also "my self" that so Amazing. Looking at their life that ussual far from their hometown but they still stay alive by their ownway. Akram, Naura, Nita, Raoof, Binu, Sameer, Nazeer, and some real friends near to me also have some difficult things but glad till now, they still alive happily in their ownway in their own sight.
Sometimes, We forget if in "Imperfect" is actuall word from I'm perfect. So that everyones' being, We are perfect in our imperfect ways. Keep fighting , Stay stronger, but now, i would like to tell my self ....
"Mei, You are Amazing, Trust me..."
"And To you guys who inspire me I Love You.... :P"
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